First Timer Aches

I want to decide what to paint before I start.

It’s ok to start without a plan. What arises spontaneously will awaken a part of my psyche that has long been in dormancy. My need to plan is a default and conditioned approach.

My painting needs to have a story or a concept.

I am open to receiving what comes to me naturally. It is a journey I am willing to take without the limiting expectations.

I am not skilled to paint what I want to.

I will attempt to paint in my own unique way. It doesn’t have to be perfect.

Because I have no training, I can't paint what's in my imagination.

Trusting the internal image-maker will give form to my own unique expression. I am here to let the energy lead me, instead of an aesthetic preference.

I can't be too explicit. It's better to stick to painting abstract.

My painting doesn’t define me or my inner world. So to say I am not my painting. I am here to explore the whole spectrum of expression rather than stay within the limits of appropriateness.

Painting darkness or goriness would be risky. I should stick to happy stuff.

I would paint the dark if it comes to me for the sake of an honest approach. I am more curious than shy about the mystery of the collective and the impersonal visual stream.

I'll scratch this painting and start a new one.

What if I stay and be with what I don’t like? What is the potential here that is not yet in my awareness?

My painting is ugly.

In this approach I am willing to hold how I feel about the paintings with curiosity. Understanding that authentic expression can take any form and all is welcome.